Archive | March, 2012

Meetings w/Food. #firstworldproblems

29 Mar

Make PH want to cry.  Here’s a list of things that can (and will go wrong):

1.  The food does not arrive on time (it does matter if you order it to be delivered an hour early – this will inevitably get messed up at some point).

2.  The wrong food comes.

3.  There is only one of you to simultaneously set up the meeting, welcome guests, chase down guests who are late.

4.  Too much food is ordered.

5.  Not enough food is ordered.

6.  Someone has issues with the (free) food.

7.  The food needs to be cancelled last minute – thus creating a terrible relationship with the company the food was ordered from.

8.  There is no cutlery or plates to be found anywhere.

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A hateful experience.

 

Timeliness is Next to…Nothing.

29 Mar

Ever punctual PH cannot believe people consistently are late to work.  With no excuses about kids and meetings starting at the reasonable hour of 9AM, how difficult is it to arrive before 9:20? 

 

PH can’t make this up.

25 Mar

Ex-Boyfriend’s Mom has now moved the top echelons of people PH has ever hated in the work place.  In today’s meeting, where, naturally, PH takes notes (who else would volunteer?), PH made the very grave error of NOT ADDING A QUESTION MARK ON THE END OF A VERY INSIGNIFICANT LINE.  What did Ex-Boyfriend’s Mom do?  Well, of course, kindly lean over and point out, ‘You should put a question mark there.’

PH wonders if this woman has ever stopped to actually consider her actions or comments.

Yikes and double yikes!

25 Mar

Remember last week when PH waxed philosophical about what the various members of her department actually did?  Turns out, Mr. Vanilla isn’t going to do much for much longer.  That’s right – in the School there are a certain number of set positions that are sponsored.  Well, in a stroke of brilliance the outgoing Director neglected to tell Mr. Vanilla that his job wasn’t going to be a sponsored role at the end of his contract.  PH has to giggle at the inefficiency, but is also a bit sad – Mr. Vanilla has clearly lost out on months of opportunity to look for another role.  The School now wants to shove Mr. Vanilla into another upcoming vacant role, but RH hopes he gets the hell out of town.  She STILL cannot figure out what he does.

Technically, it's 'your post no longer exists,' but you get the idea.

Herding the cats.

25 Mar

PH is not starting the week off well. For having been at work for 1 hour already she’s witnessed the following:

1.  With the exception of the consultants, every SINGLE person is late for the start of a week of meetings.  PH finds this completely unacceptable.

2.  PH wonders why Ex-Boyfriend’s Mom – the person in charge of these meetings – was not only late but is now NOT AT THE START OF THE MEETINGS.

3.  PH remembers why she NEVER wants to return to being an Assistant again.

 

More developments from Hell Week as they arrive.

 

Who wears short skirts?

21 Mar

Apparently, PH.  Yes, today PH was told her skirt was too short.  Poor PH – she’s worn this skirt throughout the region, but today, in a “liberal” environment (a School), her nearly touching the knee skirt was mentioned by a colleague as ‘too short.’  PH is fine with this, however, when a manager constantly and clearly shows the upper part of her bra, how is that not more offensive?

'Cause that's how PH rocks.

PH just realized…

21 Mar

She doesn’t know what two people in her department actually DO with their day.  Mr. Vanilla and Nice Dad.  Mr. Vanilla seems content to, week after week, procrastinate on basic tasks, so she wonders what his actual output of work is.  She wonders this because they have time to get in late, take lunch every day and yesterday, leave early.

And nary a ‘thank you’ was uttered.

21 Mar

PH has a particular soft spot for manners.  So, when she sent through three very intricate itineraries to three very senior members of the School’s main campus and heard not a word back, she was a bit irked.  PH says ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ to nearly everyone – regardless of nationality or culture.  She wonders how anyone on main campus is so incapable of  just hitting reply, and then something along the lines of ‘really appreciate your help’ or ‘thanks for this’ or even ‘tx.’

Sad times, indeed.

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PH always knew she loved the Bloggess, and now she knows why.

20 Mar

The Bloggess used to work in HR, nuff said.

Enough already.

20 Mar

PH would like to take this opportunity to share an open letter to Ex-Boyfriend’s Mom:

Dear EBFM,

I dislike you immensely.  While I have arranged your entire next week for five guests you’ve invited, you have the audacity to come back with absolutely bitchy e-mails like the one you sent today.  Let me clue you in on a very important fact: the world or the HR department does not revolve around you.  Furthermore, in case you are that incredibly dense, I am a bit busy at this juncture – mostly putting together things for you, the rest of the department, my former manager and your boss – yes, in case you forgot, my old role has not been replaced and the assistant to your boss is also MIA.  I do not appreciate you picking on unbelievably small details that no one gives two shits about.  No one likes your competency project.  In fact, everyone on campus now hates the word ‘competency.’

Please do me a favor and NEVER send a shitty e-mail like the one you sent again.

Copying in your boss on the e-mail was especially immature and unappreciated.

Furthermore, no ONE is going to read the change – you’re just going to end up cluttering people’s inboxes again.

Go to hell.

~Princess Helper