A note on SOPs.

2 Oct

Over the summer, Troll Feet declared that she and PH would one day put together a SOP for training.  That’s right, a STANDARD FUCKING OPERATING PROCEDURE for meetings.  Meetings, as in, show up on time, pay attention and generally be a normal human being – those kind of meetings.  Never mind Troll Feet cannot follow her own advice and still continues to play games on her smartphone every time she is called to pay attention for more than 5 minutes.  Yesterday, Troll Feet mentioned this complete waste of time again, to which PH mumbled something to the affirmative.  PH wonders if Troll Feet actually thinks they will ever complete these notes or how long they will be.

Here, PH has drafted a version of what the SOP might look like:

1.  Flipcharts – for the love of God, there must always be at least 1, preferably 2

2.  A Koosh ball

3.  Never check your documents until the meeting has already started, frantically text a bored PH who will jump at your beck and call to find and deliver them

4.  Complain the tables are not round, when there are no round tables on campus

5.  Text PH inane comments like ‘how about we get some pics of me training,’ have PH wonder how she would accomplish this or make Troll Feet look normal

6.  Bark orders at the nice and helpful FM staff

There’s a scene in Parks and Rec where Tom ‘takes notes’ for Leslie’s memoir…PH feels the same way for anything Troll Feet says.

Not even kidding, here is what Troll Feet spent the whole day working on sent through to PH.

TRAINING SET-UP.

Consider yourself lucky you do not have to deal with such documents.

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